Thoughts on Being Civil & Self Sufficient: Toilette Paper and Tater Tots
Once upon a time everyone understood the rules of a polite or civil society. You didn’t discuss religion, politics or money in public situations. Nor did you use derogatory language in conversation.
Once upon a time everyone understood the rules of a polite or civil society. You didn’t discuss religion, politics or money in public situations. Nor did you use derogatory language in conversation. This is where it all fell apart. The definition of derogatory has changed. Meanings of words have changed. The line of what is wrong or indecent has shifted and allows many uncivil things into our society. “Social Media” has accelerated the wave of incivility.
Once, a man opening a door for a lady was fine, expected. Now it’s sexist.
Once, opening a door for an elderly person showed respect. Now it rarely happens, especially in urban settings.
Once, playing loud music in cars was frowned upon and wasn’t done. Now it’s common to hear about “bitches and hoes” blasting from other cars that I swear may blow up from the vibrations.
Civility is lost when institutions are no longer respected, public debate is squashed and opposing viewpoints are censored.
In this world of cancel culture attack, it is very easy to feel helpless, especially if your viewpoints don’t line up with people you know and love. It’s easy to feel anxious if you just go along with the dominant opinion, you begin to lose who you are when this happens. While it may be difficult to do, it is important to engage in conversations that express your viewpoint. Colleges these days don’t welcome productive civil debate as they once were bastions for that. So, If you didn’t learn how to engage in uncomfortable conversations at college, in grammar school, in your neighborhood, in high school, or in civic organizations, then how are you going to be able to make tough decisions? How are you going to maintain a civil society?
There’s nothing like a pandemic to illustrate how ugly people can be, especially in an uncivil society.
Why is it, that when people fear the end of civilization, as they know it, they hoard toilette paper? From the Facebook page of Newport, Oregon Police Department, March 14, 2020 during the COVID-19 crisis:
It’s hard to believe that we even have to post this. Do not call 9-1-1 just because you ran out of toilet paper. You will survive without our assistance.
In fact, history offers many other options for you in your time of need if you cannot find a roll of your favorite soft, ultra-plush two-ply citrus scented tissue.
Seamen used old rope and anchor lines soaked in salt water. Ancient Romans used a sea sponge on a stick, also soaked in salt water. We are a coastal town. We have an abundance of salt water available. Sea shells were also used.
Mayans used corncobs. Colonial Americans also used the core of the cob. Farmers not only used corncobs, but used pages from the Farmer’s Almanac. Many Americans took advantage of the numerous pages torn from free catalogs such as Sears and Roebuck. The Sears Christmas catalog, four times thicker than the normal catalog, could get a family of three wiped clean from December through Valentine’s Day; or Saint Patrick’s Day if they were frugal.
Then, of course, there are always alternatives to toilet paper. Grocery receipts, newspaper, cloth rags, lace, cotton balls, and that empty toilet paper roll sitting on the holder right now. Plus, there are a variety of leaves you can safely use. Mother Earth News magazine will even tell you how to make your own wipes using fifteen different leaves. When all else fails, you have magazine pages. Start saving those catalogs you get in the mail that you usually toss into the recycle bin. Be resourceful. Be patient. There is a TP shortage. This too shall pass. Just don’t call 9-1-1. We cannot bring you toilet paper.
Seriously?
Do you want to know what else I saw while shopping for weekly groceries at the start of the COVID-19 pandemic sequestering? A woman with one of those very large shopping carts, overflowing with impractical stuff, including toilette paper, digging deep into the freezer of frozen vegetables grabbing all she could, with her back turned, a second woman grabbed all of the bags of tater tots out of the first woman’s cart.
How civil was that?
Question: What happens when/if the electricity goes out?
I have Mormon friends who introduced me to the concept of the “Two Year Store”. The reasoning they keep the “Two Year Store” is for some sort of disaster like getting laid off, or a natural disaster or a health emergency. The “Two Year Store” is where in Mormon homes there is a closet that contains enough food and other supplies to last the family for two years of a disaster. They actively rotate the stock in and out basing this exercise on known expirations dates (what it says on the box or can is not necessarily true (search on “expiration dates food preppers”)). While I could say something further insensitive like, “they’re not as crazy as the Preppers”, I found the logic to be sound and a habit I sort of adopted years ago.
While everyone else was scrambling to hoard toilette paper and tater tots, I had a month supply of “stuff” already stored. I bought stuff on sale and in bulk as routine shopping. With the pandemic, I knew that eventually people would run out of extra money to stockpile fresh and shelf stable staples, so I bought just the fresh items I needed and used some of what I had stored. After the first three weeks were past, I was able to replenish fresh and much of what I stored. My Millennial who didn’t do this, knew I did and before we had to “shelter in place”, asked me for a list. This is the customized list I sent based on the likes and dislikes I was aware of:
10-25 lbs rice.
5 lbs dry black beans.
A dozen cans of tomato product, diced, sauce, stewed etc.
Dried potatoes - mashed potatoes dry.
Popcorn kernels – not the microwave kind.
3-5 pounds pasta - a variety of shapes.
Canned Tuna, spam.
Dried milk, large can or box.
2 large cans Crisco or shelf stable lard.
2 bottles vegetable oil.
1 large tin olive oil.
10 pounds flour.
10 pounds sugar.
Several packs of yeast - to make bread.
Evaporated milk, several cans - check expiration dates.
3 pounds coffee.
Kraft Mac and cheese.
Heinz ketchup.
Mayo –Hellman’s.
Ground beef 5-10 pounds to freeze. Freeze in one serving (1/2 or 1 pound) chunks.
Ziplock bags quart and gallon, foil, plastic wrap (2 of each).
5 pounds onions.
5-10 pounds potatoes fresh.
Fresh carrots, 3 pounds.
1 bunch celery.
Frozen veggies like corn, peas, etc. veggies you like
Whatever beer and liquor you like - buy a case of each.
Over the counter cold and pain relief.
Band-Aids, Rubbing alcohol, Hydrogen Peroxide, Witch Hazel.
Any prescriptions for 60 days.
Toilette Paper, Paper towels, napkins - more than you'd usually buy.
Cleaning supplies, especially anything with bleach.
Hand sanitizer.
Hand soap.
Shampoo & other personal items.
My bulk food items like the beans, dry potatoes, flour, sugar, pasta are stored in Mylar sealable bags with the oxygen removed in 5 gallon buckets sealed with snap on lids. The other canned items are stacked to fit in 5 gallon buckets sealed with snap on lids.
The refrigerated stuff is stored in the refrigerator and freezer and used first.
I also preserve food extensively in the summer, mainly because I enjoy doing it but also because of that “what-if” scenario. In my planning, I know how much we use and how much extra I’ll have if I overdo it. Sometimes I can’t resist a farm stand offering or I have grown too many tomatoes. If I have too much one-year, I don’t make it the next year or I make a reduced amount. Here’s what I end up with each summer:
5 cases (a case is 12 jars) pint size tomato sauce.
2 cases quart size tomato sauce.
2 cases quart size tomato juice. (Makes great Bloody Mary’s and soup base)
1 case pint size sliced peaches.
1 case pint size spiced pears.
3 cases pint size green beans.
3 cases half pint size fruit jam (a variety of fruit).
3 cases pint size applesauce.
1 case half pint size pancake-ready sliced apples.
3-5 cases pint size pickled stuff (cucumber, spring onions, asparagus, beets, sweet peppers, Brussels sprouts, cauliflower).
6-pint size jars Sauerkraut (I’m the only one who likes it).
1 case quart size white potatoes.
1 case quart size sweet potatoes.
2 cases quart size chicken broth.
2 cases quart size beef broth.
1 case pint size preserved lemons.
5-5 oz bottles hot sauce.
Being self sufficient and self reliant also keeps a society civil. The acts of collecting, preserving and storing these kinds of items gives peace of mind and distracts temporarily from the meaningless things we are typically surrounded by.
While my lists may not fit your needs or be approved by Mormons or “Preppers”, it gives you an idea of where to start. You can find these kinds of lists and how to “prep” online - if this sort of activity is now important to you. The “Preppers” have the best information.
Excerpt from my recent book: OK Boomer: What We Failed to Teach American Millennials