Six - Homeschooling Series: Is My Child Gifted?

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Mt. Everest.

A wise woman once told me “If you think your kid is gifted, they probably are”. The problem for me was that in the ‘90s when I started on the homeschool journey with my child, I didn’t really understand what being gifted meant.

The child who does well in school, gets good grades, wins awards, and “performs” beyond the norms for his or her age, is considered talented. Like cheetahs, highly gifted children can be easy to identify. If a child teaches herself Greek at age five, reads at the eighth grade level at age six or does algebra in second grade we can safely assume that child is a highly gifted child. Stephanie S. Tolan, Is It a Cheetah? (1996).

Common traits of the gifted child:

• My student possesses a capacity to achieve at higher than average level.

• My student possesses multiple, specialized, unique interests.

• My student has an advanced ability to conceptualize, and a high interest in applying the concepts.

• My student has intense, long-range concentration on topics of interest.

• My student demonstrates high creativity.

• My student has an evolved sense of humor.

• My student takes pleasure in thinking divergently.

• My student takes pleasure in learning.

• My student possesses curiosity and interest in the unusual.

• My student is an independent learner.

• My student has a higher sense of self-awareness and of social issues.

• My student has an intense sense of fairness.

• My student demonstrates idealism.

• My student demonstrates perfectionism.

Did you answer, “yes!” to many – or all – of these?

I did.

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I get many questions about how I homeschooled my student. Especially once one finds out he’s an Aerospace engineer working in his field since graduation.

My student was what experts call “highly gifted”, which presented its own unique degrees of difficulty with homeschooling. There’s always an aura of mystery portrayed when the subject of giftedness comes up, and that was as much of a stumbling block as it was a “gift”.

I pulled my kid out of school then because I felt the school system would do harm to who he was. I imagine the idea that the school system will do harm is present in decisions being made about homeschooling in the current education environment.

The nuts and bolts of what you need to do to homeschool, no matter what your situation is, will be similar to what I had to do, and it is all common sense stuff.

Homeschooling is not just curriculum. It is a myriad of decisions about a lifestyle you’re choosing for your family.

This is the sixth edition in my homeschooling series. This is the story of how I realized my child was gifted. Maybe it will help you make the same discovery too.

This series, which is periodically presented on Thursdays, will deliver common sense ideas for those who want to homeschool or who are already homeschooling and need some new ideas. Links to the previous editions are below.

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At a time when our country needs a deep intellectual talent pool, the squandering of these bright young minds is a national tragedy. Jan & Bob Davidson. 2004.

Jan and Bob Davidson write about “the quiet crisis in education” in their book Genius Denied: How to Stop Wasting our Brightest Young Minds.

Unless you experience your own quiet crisis first hand, you may not realize the impact of that statement.

The Davidson’s describe the quiet crisis as gifted students spending their days in classrooms learning how to cope with boredom as they are forced to relearn skills they mastered years before.  They also describe that some of these students become severely depressed in a classroom setting.

I had my own brush with “the quiet crisis” at second grade, only at the time had not yet heard of the Davidson’s or Genius Denied.

In my students second grade class, they were studying basic flat geometric shapes, mine already knew basic flat shapes and had moved on to build complex, three dimensional geometric shapes (at home), and could calculate the volume of a sphere (learned from experimenting with throwing water balloons off the back porch (I later learned)).

Because he wasn’t at all interested in the areas he already mastered, teachers suggested that my student had an attention deficit disorder (ADHD).

In those days it was a common situation for teachers to suggest ADHD to get “unruly” kids on Ritalin (a habit forming drug used to treat attention deficit disorder). They knew most of the basic symptoms of ADHD and often applied the list to every distracted kid.

When you have a hammer, everything looks like nail…

The list of “characteristics” of gifted kids and symptoms of ADHD can be similar sometimes. In a nutshell (a very short explanation) the difference between ADHD kids and gifted kids is that the ADHD kid will exhibit symptoms all of the time, the gifted kid, only when he’s bored with what’s going on in the classroom.

Fortunately, I knew my student better than it seemed they did. Instead of rushing him to a psychologist for an ADHD diagnosis as they suggested, I explored other avenues.

I had read about “giftedness” in children, but I didn't really understand what that meant.

Don’t all children have gifts and talents?

After further reading on the subject of giftedness, I had the Woodcock-Johnson Achievement test administered. It was an early indicator of just how gifted my student was.

He showed that he had abilities far above “the norm” in several areas.

The test administrator suggested that my student was “highly gifted” in some areas and “off the charts” in other areas.

Naturally, at that point in my life, I shared the Woodcock-Johnson information with the school. Surely they would be able to educate a student that was “highly gifted” in some areas. They presented some ideas that didn’t feel right to me, but even more interesting was that the school claimed that they only “taught to” an IQ of 120.

The suggestions the school provided were that my student could stay with the current group of kids and do more advanced work in a special class once a week or he could skip a grade. They also wanted to focus on my student’s small motor issues in a special class. It seemed to me to be the perfect recipe for personal disaster for my student.

When I asked what the gifted education policy was at the school, they really didn’t know what I was asking about. Neither did I, but I was hoping to find out what they knew.

The school assumed I was seriously considering their solutions. After all, they were the experts weren’t they? What they didn’t realize was that I had been exploring another option, homeschooling.

That was in 1999...

In the Fall of 2009, my student went to the college of his choice, a well known, top ten Engineering University (he made me promise to keep his identity private, so mom’s not allowed to brag too much) and studied in the field of his choice.

In May of 2014, my student graduated in his field of Aerospace Engineering and he was hired into that field while completing his last semester of college.

As of 2023 he is working with that same corporation in his field using that degree.

Loves it.

How I Discovered My Child Was Gifted

There were lots of little things I observed with my child that were different than the way other kids his age behaved. Once, driving my kiddo and two of his kindergarten friends home for a play date, I heard the following conversation:

Kid 1: “Some day I’m going to climb Mt. Everest.”

Kid 2: “How tall is Mt. Everest?”

My kid: “No one really knows because Everest is always shifting.”

I researched his remark and found he was correct in that statement. I wondered how he knew that and asked him.

He said “National Geographic, mom”.

This was in kindergarten.

At first, I tried reading books covering the concept of giftedness. The internet wasn’t as robust then, so I headed to the library and bookstores.

Back then, there really weren’t any good books on the subject of giftedness in children. Today there are more books on the topic but the only one I ever recommend is that first book I found: Guiding the Gifted Child: A Practical Source for Parents and Teachers by James T. Webb, Elizabeth A. Meckstroth, Stephanie S. Tolan (1982).

A newer book I have read and can recommend with caveats as a resource to understanding giftedness is: A Parent’s Guide to Gifted Children by James T. Webb, Janet L. Gore, Edward R. Amend, Arlene R. DeVries (2007).

The book Guiding the Gifted Child doesn’t really get into the idea of schooling, but it is good about describing every other aspect of life for the gifted student, but missed it regarding homeschooling.

My guess, because homeschooling gifted children in those days was unheard of.

A Parent’s Guide to Gifted Children not only gets into schooling but one can come away from that read with the idea that the only place for a gifted student to be “educated” is an institutionalized school setting. I totally disagree with that idea and I am on the other end of the spectrum. It’s why I recommend it with caveats, but it also covers every other aspect of life for the gifted student.

With all the reading, I discovered that testing (gifted assessment) was the best way to determine giftedness. So, I had the Woodcock-Johnson tests of Cognitive Abilities and the Slosson Intelligence Quotient (IQ) tests administered. Tests then were administered in the schools, psychologists offices and other test centers.

I opted for a test center that was operated by a psychologist.

The Woodcock-Johnson tests of Cognitive Abilities tests were devised by Richard Woodcock and Mary E. Bonner Johnson in the late 1970’s and were the standard for measuring a wide variety of cognitive skills. I used the III version and it has since been updated in 2014, to IV.

The Slosson Intelligence test is a quick verbal intelligence test that measures intelligence quotients from 10 to 164 and covers a broad range of topics including general information, vocabulary, comprehension, math skills, auditory memory and more.

Having a child tested solely to assign a number to his/her I.Q. is not really a good idea in my opinion.

This number shows only a potential, not an outcome.

The test administrator suggested that my student was “highly gifted” in some areas and “off the charts” in other areas.  The Stanford-Binet was recommended at the time and I declined. I wasn’t really sure what that would tell me.  In that test seating, my student showed that he had abilities far above “the norm” in several areas.

The I.Q. element provided the ticket to some “gifted programs” early on.

Later on, I had the Wechsler Intelligence Scale for Children (WISC-IV) administered and again the test administrator suggested the same thing, my student was “highly gifted” in some areas and “off the charts” in other areas.

The WISC is a battery of tests for 6 to 17 year old children that evaluate intellectual abilities. The WISC consists of two scales, the Verbal Scale and the Performance Scale. Each of these scales has several sub tests.

The Verbal Scale measures language expression, comprehension, listening, and the ability to apply these skills to solving problems. The examiner gives the questions orally, and the child gives a spoken response.

The Performance Scale assesses nonverbal problem solving, perceptual organization, speed, and visual-motor proficiency. Included are tasks like puzzles, analysis of pictures, imitating designs with blocks, and copying.

The results however with this seating revealed extreme highs and extreme lows, which proved to be an interesting diagnosis of “twice exceptional” or “twice gifted”. This topic for another time…

Everything I learned about testing was that though it may give interesting data like a subset of knowledge it was looking for, it doesn’t reveal who your student is as a person, how much effort they apply to learning, how they learn, or what kind of student they might become.

Another thing I found back then with testing, was the person evaluating the results seemed to take perverse pleasure in unnerving me in my ability as a parent to be able to “educate” my own child.  

Over the years I observed that those same kinds of people also were the ones that seemed to advocate sequestering bright kids in “gifted schools” or “programs”.  Though it may be true that gifted kids need to be around others like them sometimes, I think the idea of “grouping” them together for long periods of time is about as intelligent as forcing public school kids to learn the same things at the same time.  

I think the success my student found was in being able to relate to all kinds of people out in the real world, in all kinds of situations and that is the beauty of what homeschooling did for him.

What Did Gifted Assessment Reveal?

But in getting back to the topic of gifted assessment, for me, the combination of the Woodcock-Johnson tests of Cognitive Abilities and the Slosson Intelligence tests didn’t help with what to do in our homeschool, it helped with the decision to homeschool.

The WISC-IV testing hatched the idea that my student was going to need to learn “differently” than the majority of kids his age and that also pointed to homeschooling.

Remember, I had these tests administered at an early age, so I was also inexperienced as a parent and the test administrator was keen on that idea and made suggestions about “gifted school” and gifted “programs”.

With the suggestion to hand my child over to “experts” who knew better than I did came the idea that my kid had immense potential that he may have wanted to develop on his own; that may have never developed had I handed him over to those “experts”.

Assessment revealed:

• My student was “gifted”, at least by someone else’s definitions.

• A dominant learning style.

• Early indicators of  “inabilities”.

• The “subjects” where my student had strengths and weaknesses.

Photo Credit: Collette Greystone.

My Thoughts on Intelligence Testing

Is intelligence quotient (I.Q.) important when identifying a gifted student that you want to homeschool?  In a word, no, and having a child tested solely to assign a number to I.Q. is not really a good idea either in my opinion.

This number shows only a potential, not an outcome and it is a number that can intimidate you, if you let it.

The following is one of the more commonly used categorizations of IQ scores. Like everything else, different people have different ideas about where the breakpoints should be for each category and the numbers of people who fit into each category.

• 85 Lower normal

• 100 Upper normal

• 115 Bright

• 130 Gifted

• 145 Highly gifted (approximately 1 in 1,000)

• 160 Exceptionally gifted (approximately 1 in 100,000)

• 180+ Profoundly gifted (approximately 1 in 1,000,000)

I.Q. tests do however give you a number that may offer an admission ticket for your student into “gifted programs”, if that’s what you choose to do as part of your homeschool.

Early in our homeschool days, we participated online in the Stanford University Education Program for Gifted Youth (EPGY) for Math and Composition and later in person at the Gifted Education Resource Institute (GERI) at Purdue University for engineering classes and several other “gifted” programs. (EPGY has been transformed to “Stanford Online High School” and serves grades 7-12, GERI is still available at Purdue for summer studies.)

Back then, these programs required I.Q. scores for admittance. In glancing at the admissions requirements recently, there’s a whole lot of “diversity” and “inclusion” statements, so review with that caveat (a warning or caution).

These programs were good for enabling my student to be around others like him, and at points in our careers together – that was important.

One thing I have observed was that even though there was a high I.Q. number with my student, it didn’t guarantee the ability to be successful academically or to be able to handle many common sense things.

With homeschooling, together you can develop an individualized educational and life plan that will lead your student down paths that will make them well rounded in life as an adult.  

On top of reading, writing and arithmetic, at home your student can also learn how to make a decent pot of macaroni and cheese, awesome ham sandwiches and know the wonder of Clorox® on dirty white socks, and these skills matter long after the idea of a high I.Q. fades.

Photo Credit: Unsplash. Leon-Pascal Janjic.

Can I Homeschool My Gifted Child?

That was the big question I asked myself.

I knew he was eventually going to be smarter than me in certain areas, but I had experience on my side and reminded him frequently about that. And, I would remind him I had a knowledge base in other subjects he was never going to be interested in.

Referring back to my list above, common traits of the gifted child, know that there are varying lists of the characteristics of gifted kids, my list contains most of common characteristics I’ve seen dispensed from the “experts”.

A gifted student will exhibit most if not all of these characteristics - sometimes all in one day!

These characteristics can be a whole lot of fun some days and incredibly draining on other days. The big plus with homeschooling is that your student will feel like he can be himself and I think that is a good thing, even if it costs you your sanity on some days.

If he were in a school all day, he would encounter peers who may find these characteristics odd.

What do you think that would do to him/her?

The whole reason we homeschooled was that I came to the realization that the school my student was in at second grade was not set up to deal appropriately with the kind of student he was then, and that he would eventually become.

For several years after my decision to homeschool I wondered if it was just our situation, my imagination or are the “educationists” really not prepared to deal with kids like mine? My biggest fear was that if my student stayed in the school system, the individual that he was would just disappear.

Homeschooling can be the most rewarding and most challenging task you will ever undertake. Homeschooling the gifted kid presents its own special set of challenges.

Think about these ideas:  

• Does your child seem bored easily?

• Do you wonder if he has some sort of attention deficit?

• Does your student move from one task to another often without completing them?

If this is the case, as the one who may potentially homeschool this student, can you deal with these common traits of giftedness?

These traits are not easy to deal with and it is OK for you to admit to yourself that these traits are challenging dimensions to your student.

But here’s yet another thought, in a world where in the future our children will have to be ever more flexible and creative, do you think homeschooling your student will help them be happy, well adjusted and contributing adults?

The ideal learning environment for gifted students includes:

• An emphasis on high-level thinking and problem solving.

• Learning that is flavored with abstractness and complexity.

• Learning based in originality, novelty and unpredictability.

• An emphasis on individualized learning.

• Situations of self-directed discovery and experimentation.

• Open-endedness.

• Inter-disciplinary learning across traditional boundaries.

• Opportunities for self-evaluation.

If you really think about this, it certainly is not a description of the environment in most institutionalized schools. But as the one potentially homeschooling a gifted student, do you think you can provide an environment like this list describes?

It’s not difficult, because when you really think about it, this is what life outside an institutionalized school is like.

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BOOKS

Genius Denied: How to Stop Wasting our Brightest Young Minds by Jan and Bob Davidson.

Guiding the Gifted Child: A Practical Source for Parents and Teachers by James T. Webb, Elizabeth A. Meckstroth, Stephanie S. Tolan.

A Parent’s Guide to Gifted Children by James T. Webb, Janet L. Gore, Edward R. Amend, Arlene R. DeVries.

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Previous Editions in This Series